True Self is an illusion | You don't have to look for her, just do this instead | Episode 14

It’s the words we use that confuse. Many times, teachers like myself will speak in opposites. It’s not because we don’t know what we are saying, but each and everyone of you hears the message differently. So, we play with words; we twist and turn them upside down to show you how bendable they are. We show you how words can create and break at the same time. It’s like catching air.

Is it possible? Can you close your hands and trap air inside? Is the air inside your hand no longer connected to the outside? Maybe it’s your hands that are trapped inside? Can you ever separate yourself from space? As you walk through air, as you breathe air, as you feel the air go through your hair. It’s almost like there is something else there, but you would never know until you become aware.

Becoming your true self is a trap because it drives you to search for someone who doesn’t exist in your physical reality. No matter how hard you try. She is never there because becoming your true self is something you can not see, hear, taste, or smell. Don’t go on a journey to become your true self. You don’t need to waste your time and energy. Why would you search for someone who is an emergent property?

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It’s like looking for your true self in your accessories. Aren’t they on your body? Attached, but you don’t even notice them. They blend in and become part of you. Together, you and the accessories form the whole. And so is your true self enfolded inside your soul.

When we become seekers, we are on this non-stop search of becoming. Constantly, trying to figure out who we really are. It’s only when we stop, don’t move, and observe can we remember what once was forgotten.

You have been your True Self from the day you were born. You just don’t remember. You have amnesia about something that should be known to you. It’s frustrating, especially if you hear someone like me speak and make it sound so easy, but it doesn’t feel easy. It’s not so clear cut. Why do I feel the need to search for myself?

Something happens to you on a day-to-day basis that makes it impossible to be your true self. This is something obvious that if you think about it, you’ll agree with me, but as long as you have no awareness of it, you’ll be chasing this invisible carrot. Thinking that you’re doing the right thing, but you’re walking yourself into a dead end.

Instead of asking yourself who is my True Self?

Ask yourself: “When” is my True Self?

Think about it.

Are you the same person you were 20 years ago? Was I the same person back then as I am now. No, for sure, I was a different person 20 years ago. Am I the same person now compared to when I was 5 years old? No.

So, who is the true self?

The five-year-old, the 20-year-old or the you now?

The moral of the story is that you are an impermanent being. At your core, there is an unchanging part, the being. The part we call your soul, but the mind and body are always changing. They never stand still. The human is impermanent.

All your likes, dislikes, preferences, but as well your moral codes and boundaries change as we age. These changes depend on my environment and how high my level of consciousness is.

So becoming your true self can become a trap. You will search and search until you find her, and then what?

Finally, I know who I am, but then years pass by and I change again. How can that be? I thought I was done? A finished product. I will have to become flexible again and open myself up for change? No, I don’t want to. I refuse to change because this is the true me, and if I change again. Who will I become? I won’t be true to myself, and the illusion has begun. Your soul wants you to evolve, but you can’t because the person you had decided upon was the True Self holds on to certain beliefs you can’t let go of. Your beliefs evolved, but now your true self did not. It feels as if you are betraying yourself. You are no longer true to you. If you are not careful, you can become unconscious, again, and become stuck where you are.

How can you grow to a higher level of consciousness if you have already reached your mental ceiling? I am the real me, right now. What about tomorrow? What about 10 years from now? Will you ever know your True Self?

Yes, when you remember you already are, and always have been. Every version of you is true. There is not just one version of you who was real. We just grow to a higher version of the true self you have always been. So, don’t worry if you contradict yourself. Last year you liked green, this year you like blue. Who is the true you?

How can you keep your mind free of the trap of looking for a self other than you?

Remember, these 2 points: Point 1...

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Hi, I am Jeanice, founder, teacher and author of Fabulous One Philosophy. Born in South America, raised in The Netherlands. Fell in love with an American and flew around the world to live our lives together. In 2010, we resided in Abu Dhabi, UAE and I became a mom. It was the catalyst to my spiritual awakening. I realized it was a great opportunity to sit still and dive deep. It was the first time in my life I asked myself: "Who am I?" Little did I know that question took me all the way down the rabbit hole, and I became a seeker for many years until I had my kundalini awakening. Excited about my experience, I decided to write it all down to share my newfound wisdom and created a self-mastery system, so I can help others mothers become The Awakened Mom.

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