Toxic mother-daughter relationships and why self-realization is the only solution | Reason One

Updated: Jan 28

Why should you learn my Self-Mastery System for moms? This video series will be a summary of why I believe self-mastery is the most important skill to have in life. It’s the difference between suffering or eternal bliss. Once you become a self-master, your thoughts can no longer hurt you, and you will feel on top of your game, almost every day, even when you do nothing. I’ve heard a few statements passing by on the internet that I just don’t agree with.


Statement 1: Motherhood doesn’t make you special

Statement 2: When you become a mom you become dumber and less ambitious

Statement 3: The role of mother belongs at the bottom of the food chain


In this series, I will debunk all these statements and give you my counter arguments for why I believe motherhood is the gateway to your Higher Self. And you can use your role of mom to become the awakened one. This video is about Reason 1:


Our children need us, and not just as parents, but as their Philosophy Teacher now more than ever.

When my daughter was born, there was no doubt in my mind I was going to become a stay at home mom. I wanted the whole experience, and not miss any moments. I just enjoyed taking care of my little girl and was doing the best I can. Of course, it helps when you have a husband who fully supports you, and wants to be the provider of the family. I am forever grateful to my husband for the opportunity to give my little girl all of me without having to stress how to pay the bills.

But even though we raised her in a loving family, slowly, but surely, I saw her unconscious mind show her face. They say the first seven years a child is a sponge and absorbs everything she learns from her environment. But neuroscience has as well debunked the myth: Tabula Rasa - which means we are born a blank slate. Neuroscience says that’s not true. From the moment our parents conceive us, the subconscious comes with pre-installed memory. You know, just like buying a new phone. There is the operating system, but nowadays they as well already pre-install all these apps. Some of them you don’t need or want, but they are there, anyway. And they even made it so that you can’t delete them. They are there, and you can only disable them. That happens to our baby in our tummy. Apps are being downloaded into her subconscious, apps that she has inherited from me, her dad, but as well her whole family lineage.


When I saw emotions, like jealousy, rage, and anger expressed by my little girl. I was at a loss. I felt it was hard not to get angry, myself. You are not the boss?! I am the mom here, right? So, you feel yourself being moved by the energy of your child. Her energy becomes your energy. Her emotions become your emotions and you feel enslaved by them. You can’t think straight. All you want to do is for her to feel better again. But you don’t know how? You feel guilty for making her feel bad even though you understand intellectually; you got to be the parent, but you want to be her best friend.

Some moments, my patience or ability to show her a different way would work, but then I see her fall back into that old pattern, so to speak. Of course, she’s a little girl, so the old pattern makes little sense, unless you realize we passed this behavior on from generation to generation.

I felt powerless. I wasn’t able to help her master the self, give her emotional intelligent tools that she could use to help her master her emotions. I understand, I won’t be able to pass that on unless I learn how to master my own emotions. It ignited a burning desire to figure this out. I set out on the journey to master the self.


Long story short, I succeeded. I became a seeker and in 2017; I had a kundalini awakening and my mind and body were reset. I’m able to see life through the eyes of my Higher Self. I will tell you in other videos all about my spiritual awakening journey and what I have done to get there, but that is not the point of this video. After my self-realization, I realized something profound.

It doesn’t matter if I was awake or not. My daughter will still fall unconscious because that is the way the conscious universe has designed the selves. Soul, mind and body alignment can only happen when all three agree. The mind is the saboteur who separates herself from those two and falls asleep. It’s our destiny in childhood to fall asleep.


That was my big aha-moment! Self-realization is an individual experience you must have alone when you are ready. Until that day, you will remain unconscious. But what was more alarming was that I now had as well the experience of how much work it took in order to get here. I realized I could never just teach my daughter by simply telling her what to do. Teaching her right from wrong is not enough.

There’s something else I need to do. I need to teach my daughter on a deep metaphysical level how to handle her mind and help her remember who she is. Not just remember, but never ever forget, and hold the flame high for her higher self. I have to teach her about her unconscious mind and how the unconscious mind works.


Help her understand negative emotions are not a bad thing and her thoughts do not define who she really is. I have to teach her subconscious mind not to go in a flight or fight , and use her voice of reason, her conscious mind to discern the situation at hand. This can only happen when her conscious mind (head intelligence) connects to her heart. She needs to learn life conceptually and as well in the context she is in. Make split second decisions based on all the data input coming at her at once. Phew! I know. You don’t have to tell me?! Do we adults know how to do that?


I can understand it must sound abracadabra or just way too scientific, but I have looked at this from all angles, and my conclusion is that this is the only way out of suffering. Stick with me in the course of the next few months. I will try my best to explain everything.


Motherhood is a beautiful thing, and it’s like it gives you a second chance to redo life as a little girl. As I watched her grow and observed my daughter, I had Deja Vu moments. She would say things to me that made me remember what I had said to my mom. I saw life repeating itself, right in front of my eyes. Now, I am a mom, and I understood why my mom made certain choices or said certain things to me that, as a child, I didn’t understand.


As a child, you take everything personal; you think it’s about you. You’re a bad or a good girl. It’s impossible for you to separate the behavior from the person. They are the same. Motherhood was the catalyst to my awakening. Now, I could understand why, as a little girl I had internalized things, made them negative, but they weren’t negative, at all. Only afterwards can you connect the dots, because as a parent, I hear myself say the same things to my daughter. And all these years, I have been telling myself a story that was “negative,” but my parents never meant them as negative. I can say that for a fact now.


Where does the disconnect happen? When your parents are incapable of giving you an emotional explanation or honest talk about how they feel and why they behave a certain way. Most of us had parents who were unconscious and when they are, they can’t even tell you why they do what they do. It’s just automatic programming.


As a child, you jump to your own conclusions. What conclusions are those? I need to be a good girl. Stop behaving this way. I must be a bad girl if I do this because my parents always get upset. Even though your parents are trying to stop you from getting hurt. Your parents say “no” because it is the wise parental thing to say. We have to tell our child “no,” so many times. A child wants everything and she will ask for everything, and will not understand why she can’t have it if you say no.

Unless you explain it to her, and if you don’t, she will internalize it as “not being good enough.” She might believe you don’t love her because Trina from school gets to have all those things and obviously her parents love her more. I could see now how it happens. I could see by observing my daughter how we fell asleep!


So, when you become a mom you get to see both sides, you get to experience your daughter, and how she sees things, and now you have a better understanding because you used to be a little girl, too. And when she says certain things, I hear myself, like, oh, snap. That’s what I said when I was a little girl!

But there is something alarming happening in this process. There is a gap between what mom says and how the child perceives it. It’s like something is blocking mom from being correctly understood by the child. If I said no, I was the bad guy! But now I could see why. It’s because even though I am conscious, my daughter is not. These seven years of her life, she inherited all my unconscious patterns, first from living in my body for nine months, and then after birth.


I saw the loop I was in, and as well realized the loop my daughter was going to be in if I did not set myself free, first. I started searching for tools or methods to help me wake up. Because no matter how much I love her, no matter how unconditional my love is. It doesn’t matter. She will fall into a deep sleep. By the time she is 21, her programming is complete and the unconscious mind will be in full control.


Yes, it’s disturbing, but the proof is already out there. Our teenagers are struggling. They do not know who they are and the collective unconscious makes sure they stay that way. We never had so many children on psychiatric drugs for mental illness in human history. Studies are coming out that social media is destroying especially our teenage girls. Teenagers who don’t see the point of their life and commit suicide or worse imagine someone else’s child who is unconscious walking into high school shooting your kid!


I am not saying we don’t need medicine. It’s probably desperately needed. Why? Because we, the mothers, learned no emotional mastery that would empower us to handle whenever our children are not their best self. Whenever they feel not good enough. Can they talk to you? Do you have some wisdom to share? Who were our teachers? Our parents? How did that work out?

New technology is taking our children on an emotional rollercoaster ride and we have nothing to protect us against it. We too, feel swept up, overrun by emotions and no longer can keep our cool. We are so distracted by what’s going on in the world. Stuck to our phone, clicking those selfies, still trying to be that hot mom, but we got “nothing,” for being emotionally present for our children. We are ill-prepared to raise our children in the 21st century because the world is coming at us faster than ever before.


If I lack the emotional intelligence to guide myself when I’m angry at her father, sad about how fat I am, overwhelmed or just burned out by all the work I need to do. I do not and will not deal with whatever emotional turmoil my daughter has to deal with even though the circumstances she is born in, compared to when I was born, is extremely volatile. My tank is full and stress relief is now in the form of clicking pretty selfies, right? Making sure I show the world what I eat in a restaurant, but can’t pull up the energy to cook a home cooked meal to save my family’s life.


It’s time we, mothers, share our ancient wisdom and pass it on to our daughters. We need to go back to the fundamentals because we all want to live in palaces, but what’s the point if you build it on quick sand? It’s all fake, if we don’t even know something simple like transmuting negative energy into positive energy. Can I reach myself on a deep philosophical level when I’m angry? Or am I just screaming my lungs out because I am overflowing with emotions. If I don’t feel good enough about myself, do I know on a deep philosophical level, why I don’t feel good enough about myself?

If I ended up fighting with my friend, my mother, my sister, my husband. Do I know how and why I ended up in that fight? Do I really know what I want to achieve by fighting with them, or do I just want to control them? Make them do what I tell them to do. Otherwise, I’m going to make them feel bad or guilty for not being a good mom, a good friend, or a good husband. There are so many deep emotional reasons we feel the way we feel, but we don’t know how to access those reasons. We have no method or system to learn how to communicate in a way that is constructive and uplifting. Who teaches us how to examine our feelings and make sure that what we think is really true?


Once I planted the seed in my mind, there was no stopping me. There was no stopping me from figuring this out, and the stuff that I discovered is deep! I went all the way down the rabbit hole and because of it I can ask you questions. Not a lot of teachers will ever ask you in your lifetime. Because of my spiritual awakening, I can show you, almost prove to you, where your unconscious is hiding and why. I can snatch her out of hiding for you, but only if you are ready and with your permission, of course.


I got so good at it; I can now explain it to my daughter. I will pull up her unconscious mind right in front of her and give her a bird's eye view. I don’t allow her to hide. She needs to show me her emotions so they don’t form any energy blocks in her body. For us adults, it is too late. We already have those energy blocks. In order to remove them, you need to see the parts you’ve hidden from yourself.


Why?


Because I know in my heart, if I don’t help you solve this, we all have sealed our children’s fate. They will walk through life as teenagers, as young adults, as grown women, completely asleep, unconscious, not knowing who they are and where they are going.

It’s not our fault, but I said to myself: “It ends here, now.”

I’m going to solve this. I’m going to figure it out. So, I did, and Fabulous One Philosophy was born from my heart. I don’t know how long I will be on earth; nobody knows. By writing this book, I have put it in black and white. I have given my daughter a gift. She can pass on to her daughter and keep our generation “awake.” Wouldn’t you want the same for your family? When we know who and what we are. We can safely teach our children.


I have created the Fabulous One Framework, a self-mastery system that puts everything in perspective and gives you the emotional tools you need to deal with any situation in life. You can find my framework in my self-mastery study guide with many more eye-opening illustrations and teachings that help you connect to your Higher Self, so we can change the world by saving ourselves and our families, first.

Would you like to join my Online Self-Mastery School for Moms?


You will learn how to transform your Inner Saboteur into your Inner Strength, so you can awaken The Self-Master within and make each day your Masterpiece.

Register for free.


Inside my school, you will receive:

  1. Download Free 68 Pages of my Self-Mastery Study Guide (PDF). Learn about the 5 Stages of Self-Mastery and why Stage 5 is the hardest one and probably the reason why you can't reach enlightenment.

  2. A Masterclass about the Fabulous One Fractal Selves, the four minds within that need to unite as one. The higher self is not who you think she is and in this masterclass you will find out what you need to do to become your Higher Self.

  3. Listen to my Secret Podcast for students only. This is a private podcast for those who are interested to deepen their knowledge and learn all the secrets of self-mastery so you can become unstoppable.

  4. Stay informed about news, blog posts and podcast episodes.

  5. Be part of the Fabulous One Family, a community of moms who all want to become Masters

Can't wait to meet you and guide you on your journey of becoming the Higher Self. I'll see you inside! Sign Up Here


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About Me:

Hi, I am Jeanice, founder, teacher and author of Fabulous One Philosophy. Born in South America, raised in The Netherlands. Fell in love with an American and flew around the world to live our lives together. In 2010, we resided in Abu Dhabi, UAE and I became a mom. It was the catalyst to my spiritual awakening. I realized it was a great opportunity to sit still and dive deep. It was the first time in my life I asked myself: "Who am I?" Little did I know that question took me all the way down the rabbit hole, and I became a seeker for many years until I had my kundalini awakening. Excited about my experience, I decided to write it all down to share my newfound wisdom and created a self-mastery system, so I can help others mothers become The Awakened Mom.

If you are interested to transform your Inner Saboteur into your greatest power, but you don't know how and you would like some help?


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Love, Jeanice

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